#18 – (Dis)integrate.
Nikon F90 | Kodak Portra 400
(Dis)intergrate
I wish to melt into a puddle
Of my blood, sweat and tears;
To wash away my sin with your guilt
(Or lack thereof); To rid myself
Of doubt and fear.
Because – at this point and
In this very moment –
I have fueled more hate and distaste
Than love and life
In my being, and the only way
To relieve me is the one thing
I am unknown to.
My shortcomings fill
This tall tunnel I stand in
And my disappointment stares
Me in the face and dares
To tear apart all I stand for.
Even in this lack of light
I see my failures with clarity –
And nothing scares me more
Because I don’t know what I stand for
Anymore.
With love,
Emily.